It's All in my Head

When it comes to being financially responsible, there is danger all around.

Most of it begins in my head--that niggling feeling that I am giving up too much pleasure now, sacrificing too much personal comfort for a goal I may not even live to reach.

Of course, it is not just 58 year old white ladies who feel this way. DH, a young black woman who blogs about her finances at Debt Hater covers this very issue.

It is so easy to simply give up saving, give up reducing debt, give up financial responsibility. Every time I slip, (and I do slip, often) I find myself saying why not stop for awhile. Take a rest. Have some fun. SPEND SOME MONEY!!

What I am trying to figure out is: When did having fun become synonymous with spending money?

DH talks about buying clothes. For her, retail therapy is a response to frustration. Not me. But calling up friends and getting them to come with me to try out some new, expensive gourmet restaurant, is. My city is something of a foodie haven--there is always a new gourmet restaurant in town.

More telling is when DH says the following: "I think I was pissed that I was still in debt anyway. I read so many other blogs or articles about people in more debt paying it off much faster. I had all these posts boasting about how I'd be done so much sooner than I thought and how great I was for getting it together."

Oh my, YES! I listen to Dave Ramsey on Fridays, and I hear all those folks calling in to say how they paid of $122,000 in 11 months. Do I feel good for them? Do I want to congratulate them? Heck no! I want to reach through the phone and strangle them. But before that, I want to know how in the world they managed to do it. And I do NOT want to hear that they sold the Mercedes or that they make $200,000 a year!

So, here I stand, warts and all. I've laid out my wallet for the blogging community to see. I hope that by keeping my finances open and honest, I'll also become honest with myself.

To again quote DH: "Then, of course, it's embarrassing to put that out in cyberspace. Hi, I'm a pf blogger whose finances are sucking."

DH, I hear ya! My goal these days is to have finances that suck less than they have in the past. The heart is willing. The head is running hard to catch up.